A tsunami advisory was issued for the west coast this weekend after an underwater volcano eruption on the island of Tonga, Because the west coast doesn’t already have enough shit to deal with . . from earthquakes to mud slides to really ugly basketball. Officials were quick to point out that an advisory is not a message of impending doom. It’s more like Sheriff Brody telling everyone to get out of the water until further notice. Instead of a great white shark sighting, this warning concerns strong currents and waves that are way scarier than any fish.
Let’s get to the rest of the week . . .
Before I knew anything about tennis, I knew Chris Evert. It was as if the girl next door just so happened to be one of the best tennis players in the world. For more than three decades, Evert was the headliner in tournaments around the world. From her on-again, off-again love match with Jimmy Connors to her epic rivalry with Martina Navratilova, she ushered in the new age of tennis; she was a television celebrity while collecting eighteen grand slam titles along the way.
But it was her grace in victory and defeat that separated her from all the tennis brats. And so, when the news came down this week that Evert has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer, it became one of those moments that makes you want to scream at the unfairness of it all.
Instead, Imma hope and pray that the girl next door has one more big win left in her.
The Georgia Bulldogs made good on my prediction by winning the national title over those CFP regular attendees from Alabama 33-18 on Monday night. Okay, so I predicted the Dawgs would win it all last season, but I ain’t about to get stuck on the details in the afterglow of the school’s first football crown since Jimmy Carter was still in office.
It’s been a sports year to remember in the Peach State, with the Hawks making it all the way to last season’s Eastern Conference Finals, the Braves winning the World Series and Kirby Smart’s bunch vanquishing Emperor Palpatine and the Crimson Death Star.
And now the Falcons will try and . . . oh, never mind . . .
When a fast food joint not named Popeye’s introduces a spicy sandwich to the menu, you best dial up your gastroenterologist so they can talk you off the toilet. Since I don’t feel like contributing to my doctor’s Aruba trip this year, I’m giving the Diablo Dare sammie from Arby’s a hard no. For those of you fool enough to try it out, you’ll get a free milk shake for your trouble.
Worst last meal ever.
The White House announced that we will soon be able to test ourselves for the Coronavirus in the privacy of our own homes. If you’ve got health insurance, you’re entitled to eight free COVID at-home tests. Now, millions of Americans will be sticking foot long swabs up their noses and I gotta ask.
What’s the worst that could happen?
It looks like Putin is up to his dirty tricks once again as Russia prepares to wage a “false flag operation” in Eastern Ukraine. Basically, it means that Russia will stage an attack and then blame it on Ukraine, after which they’ll invade under the pretense of stabilizing the region. And if you’re wondering why I pasted an image of Nate and Brenda from Six Feet Under?
Because it fits.
One minute, Dusti Talavera was chilling in her crib watching TV and the next, she was risking her life in what will no doubt be a Lone Star 911 episode at some future point in time.
As three kids played outside of her Denver apartment complex, Ms. Talavera kept watch to make sure they didn’t do anything crazy. But seeing as how the kids were 4, 6 and 11 years of age, and they were busy digging into a winter wonderland, what were the chances they were concerned with playing it safe?
So when they ventured out onto a man-made pond that promptly collapsed them into the icy waters below, Talavera got to stepping. She said it was pure instinct that guided her and that before she even realized it, she was standing on the middle of the pond, because “They were babies, and they needed help,”
That’s what happens when your best self answers the bell. You don’t flinch when faced with impossible odds, you don’t back down when summoned into harm’s way, you don’t wait for a hero to show up. You become one. And so she ran outside and navigated the tenuous sheet of ice, pulling two of the kids to safety before the ice broke once again and delivered her into the pond.
Unable to pull herself out, she kept the unconscious six-year old girl’s head above water while her teenage cousin found a rope that she used to retrieve them. After which deputies from the Arapahoe County Sheriff’s Office arrived on the scene and began performing CPR until she was resuscitated.
All three kids are going to be alright, thanks to Dusti and a brave sixteen-year old boy. Three young lives get to stay crazy and wonderful, and okay, maybe it wouldn’t be the worst idea if they kept more to the latter than the former until everyone catches their breath. There’ll be plenty of time to merge crazy with wonderful, now.
I did a little simple math and when you really think about it, hundreds of years were saved on that pond. If these kids live a full life, replete with kids and grandkids, that’s hundreds and hundreds of years worth of history that didn’t get lost to the depths. Hundreds of years and thousands of places and millions of moments.
Just like that.
About the Colorado story, I summon the spirit of Keith Jackson … Whoa Nelly! Tsunamis are damn scary. Congrats on calling the Dawgs. Then again, makes me wonder why they even played the season … and how about them Bengals. They don’t win a playoff game in 31 years, so the officials dampen the thunder.
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What a story huh? She just hit the pavement running and then she hit the pond running and then she made sure that little girl was going to make it out. Just amazing.
Tsunamis scare the hell out of me. Did you ever see the movie about a family that was swept away by one? It was based on a true story.
The Dawgs got back! I think their loss to Bama in the SEC title game was actually the best thing that could have happened to them. It focused them, and they responded.
You keep saying that, Cincy. But doesn’t the win make the wait that much sweeter? I know it’s been at LEAST twenty years for us and probably longer than that. And now . . who knows?
Seriously though. If you go to play the Titans, I like your chances. And if you go to KC, I also like your chances. Not saying you’re gonna win but . . Joey Cool gives you a real shot.
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I travel to Atlanta a couple of times a year to visit family. I make it a point to get FC Atlanta tickets whenever I’m there.
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Are they good?
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B,
Where’s the tune? 😉
Tsunamis are scary business. Nothing anyone can do to stop them when they decide to wreak havoc. Let’s hope this one is more bark than bite.
It’s always sad when peeps we admire turn out to be human and subject to the dangers of cells going awry,. I sure hope they caught Evert’s in time and she makes a recovery.
Always nice when an underbulldog team rises above and wins. For someone who is not a huge Star Wars fan, you sure know how to dig up stuff…
No. Just. No. That Arby’s sammie doesn’t even look appealing.
Ah yes… those home tests are all over. Used and abused to no end, no doubt.
Buahahaha! Nate and Brenda ARE Russia and Ukraine!
Oh my goodness. That Dusti Talavera story gave me chills. And not just because I am trying to imagine how cold that water was. What a brave woman! And how serendipitous that her 16-year old cousin (as much a hero as she) was there to help her. What a heartwarming story you’ve shared. Thank you, B.
And because I was so inspired… I give you a song for this week…
Q
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Q
I am in my music-less period right now. I go through this every now and again. So I didn’t even look for a tune.
I hope so. So far all seems well, but yeah, these fuckers are scary shit. And the havoc they wreak is like a slow motion horror scene whenever you watch footage.
Me too. She’s such a genuine person, a good soul. I guess we always ask ourselves, “Why THIS person?”. Because it just does not seem fair.
Clever! Very, very clever!
Well, I know Saban and I know the evil ugly guy and they DO seem like a match, no?
It really doesn’t. Arby’s what? Just slapped together some of their many meats and said to hell with it, there it is, now let’s charge them 8 bucks for this shit!
I wonder what will come of this. Like, will people use those swabs for nefarious purpose? You KNOW some shit is going to happen that will end up on social media.
Nate and Brenda will hereby be renamed Russia and Ukraine. 😉
She didn’t hesitate. No flinching, no waiting, no problem. And just wow, because to think about what might have happened if she was not so quick to the jump.
Gracias, you are lovely. 🙂
B
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Ah hell. Then I apologise…
They are a powerful force that cannot be dismissed.
There is no “why me” or “why her”. Life and its challenge is so aleatory.
I have my moments 😉
They do, now that you mention it 🙂
Pffft. 8 bucks? Get outta heah!!
I haven’t seen what the home tests look like. I thought they were like pregnancy tests, only you spit instead of pee. Hmm.. gonna be interesting, methinks.
I second the motion!
That is so amazing. But you know, I think all heroes act first. You can’t hesitate.
De nada. Again, I should have minded my own beezewax 🙂
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Naaaaaahhhh!
Nope.
What’s with all these big words? Are you looking to git old Melville’s attention? 😉
I wouldn’t want to take one. Sticking a foot long swab up my nose is NOT my idea of fun.
It’s a song!
And they don’t.
Pffft!
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Okay then 🙂
Not at all.
Guess I’m just showing off…
No thanks. I can’t see the fun in that. At. All.
Sing it!
They can’t.
I’ll take that a good. 🙂
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Sometimes I go weeks without listening to music. It’s when I find podcasts and shit like that. I have been listening to podcasts on my runs, it’s a good way to pass the time.
You are! LOL
Peeps is gonna be YouTubing this stuff.
LAAAAAAAAAAA LAAAAAAAAAAAA LAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
And won’t.
Haha!
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Oh, interesting… I have yet to listen to a podcast. I must be lacking.
Hey! Okay… maybe a li’l…
Or TikTokking it…
LOLOLOL
😉
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There’s plenty you would love.
A li’l . . .
Both!
MUAH!
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I don’t doubt it.
😉
Right!
MWAH!
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MUAH!
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😘
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😘
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It was the cherry on top for the Bulldogs-kind of like watching the Raiders and Belichick’s bums get beaten in Wildcard games yesterday. Apparently there is a god. I suspect it’s too much to ask that Tampa Bay joins them, but I’m mostly satisfied that Bama isn’t the national champion and the Raiders & Patriots will need to start planning on filling their golf calendars. Somehow I missed that Colorado hero story, but kudos to Dusti for quick thinking and saving the lives of those kiddos. Have a great week, Marc!
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The Dawgs will be around for a while I like Kirby Smart and he’s gonna keep on recruiting studs.
As for the Patriots? When I saw that score this morning, I let out a “Hells YEAH!”. Because it’s now three years and counting since the Patriots last won a playoff game, and I love that very much.
She really jumped to it, when time was of the absolute essence. Thank God.
Thank you Monika, you do the same.
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Great edition this week, Pilgrim. I was more than happy to see Alabama take a trouncing. It couldn’t happen to a more sociable bunch. I’m with you on the hot coal sandwich. What is wrong with those people? We hear about the home test kits, but I can’t wait until the internet portal where we are supposed to order them next Wednesday crashes. I give it two minutes. Yeah, Putin. He will get us into a mess for sure. We don’t have anyone who can stop him. We keep saying if you invade the Ukraine, there will be consequences. Nothing specific, mind you, so it begs the question, why not invade? A sorry state of American diplomacy. Love the rescue and your math. You are so right. So many lives would be impacted. So sorry for Chrissy. Thanks again for a good read.
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Me too Boss. Enough is enough of the Crimson Tide. And now that the Tide AND the Patriots are both out of it, the football seasons officially rocked.
Arby’s will try anything. And that’s not helping.
You’re right! It’s going to happen, you just know it’s going to happen.
Putin isn’t afraid of us. And Joe, I’m sorry, but no matter how red faced he gets, he ain’t changing that.
Thanks to Dusti and that teenager, so many lives were impacted.
Prayers to Chrissy.
Thanks Sheriff
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😁
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I am chuffed that Chris Everett is your tennis story!!!!!
(hehehehe)
The tsunami is yet another example of mother nature’s anger. When it comes to humans… she has a lot to be pissed off about.
The rescue story is one that makes me feel good about being a human being.
Putin backward is Nitup. Sounds like hatched lice eggs.
Okay…time to make din-din!
You know I adore Thunder?
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There’s that word again. Chuffed.
And I LOVED Chris Evert back in the day. Well, I will always love Chris Evert.
You got that right. And as powerful as we THINK we are, she can put us in our place right quick if she wants to.
Me too. Amazing story.
President Nitup . .. I will refer to him that way now. 😉
And she adores you right back.
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WOOT!
Chuffed!
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Arby’s? Arby’s?!!!! People still eat that sh**?
Adored Chrissy Evert. Sorry to hear about the cancer.
Seriously, I can’t just sneeze in the home test?
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Eilene!
They sure do, and you know why? Because Arby’s has the meats! (Sorry, I always think of that commercial).
She will give this battle everything she has. And that’s a ton.
Wouldn’t that be nice? Way better than sticking a foot long swab up your schnozz, tell you what.
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Duuuuuude Chris! I remember watching her and Martini go 100% on that court. Just hustling and battling it out! I remember those wooden rackets. I got one by the way, still saved it from my youth. That sucks. That really freaking sucks she got ovarian cancer. She was a super lady and a baller! I be sending her some good vibes, we need more people like her, and less jackasses like Djokovic. And what a save one that icy pond! Hoot crap! How scary! I hadn’t heard of that story. So glad she was on it! Brave and badass. Definitely deserves to be highlighted for saving all those lives and future moments. Great post hermano. Sunshine and waves 🙂
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From classic rivals to the best of friends. Martina was one of the first to chime in after Chris announced the diagnosis.
I bought a few of those wooden rackets, Chris Evert models, a few years ago. I sold them, but I do remember having wooden rackets when I first started playing. I remember breaking one, in fact.
Joker should just go home until further notice.
Dusti and that teenager really came through.
Thank YOU hermana.
Sunshine and waves
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Dude I read an article in the Post where he got sent home. And I was like finally. Jeez. He knew the rules before even getting on them at plane! Cut it out. Glad they made the right call.
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I don’t understand when people KNOW they’re going to get busted for something and then they do it anyway. And then they make a federal case of it. Whatever!
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Rich and sweet, thanks my man
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Appreciate it PM
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Hey Marc – prayers for Chris Evert – 😦
and I did not know she was such a gracious winner – but I did know of her and that she was one great tennis pro.
–
also, the ice rescue is great – but I feel a little critical to think of a four year old out there in the first place.
either way – hero story and close call for sure –
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I will pass on that sandwich too – hahah way too hot and laughing at your reasons for avoiding it
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Chris Evert and Martina in the eighties was must see stuff. I remember pulling for Evert, who stayed in there against the great Martina.
Yeah, I always look at stories and think “Would I have let my kids outside in that weather without watching them?” Not me, that’s for sure.
I like spice, but I like flavorful spice, not just heat for heat’s sake. And I do not trust a fast food joint to deliver on the flavorful spice.
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did I mention that for a few years our family watched Judge Judy together – not sure why but at a certain age the boys and I liked it – and she taught us a few key takeaways – like don’t live with someone and then expect the courts to help you like you were married – (ha) and also that vehicles were “lethal weapons” and I was glad for stuff like for my tweens to hear!!
but she also had a few cases where parents were in the house and let the children play outside – and she reminded them that is NOT supervising because a big ol house is obstructing the vew.
I am not here to be judging – but in any weather our children need watchful eyes and supervising – and feel some folks might need to hear more stories like the one here to be reminded of it…
—
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I remember as kids, we ran wild. We went everywhere, only needing to check in from time to time. The 70s and 80s were different, I think. Or at least, we thought so.
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yes – different times and we were out and abut too – but not sure it was safer – it was just what we did eh?
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I think so. Bad people didn’t just happen post 1980. But connections, that’s the thing. Neighborhoods WERE connected once upon a time. Neighbors knew neighbors, like, knew them. People weren’t afraid to engage and get involved. Nowadays, it’s different.
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well said
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