From The Archives: Clowns To The Left Of Us, Danger To The Right

It’s leftover day here at Sorryless, and we’re dishing up a vintage selection from August 10th of 2021. This piece chats up the information age we have refurbished into a steel cage match dynamic. Because having an opinion means never having to say you’re sorry, even when you are. 

As a two scoops for the price of one special, this post also happens to be relevant to the Lebron James vs Michael Jordan GOAT debate that so many sports talking heads use to fill the time while they pretend to be journalists. I dropped the mic by issuing MY opinion on the matter and I happen to be right.

Just saying!

Is it possible to have too much information at your fingertips?

The question came to me as I was watching two sports analysts go at it on a debate show recently. The topic of conversation had to do with the best NBA player of all time. This isn’t something the vast majority of the population gives a flying Wallenda about, to be honest. But these guys deliberated until they had created a dually believable narrative, whittling it into a potent mash. Of course, well enough wasn’t left alone for very long, and as often happens inside this time of nonsense and instability, the shit went south. Further south than a Lynyrd Skynyrd Key West tour.

The succinct nature of their respective points soon gave way to a volatility whose pitch was a bitch, on wheels. And so the evaporative nature of modern discourse held sway until I stopped trying to figure out whose opinion was most valid and started wondering who was going to break out a “Yo mama!” first.

Of course, I recognize that information doesn’t fool people . . people fool people. But armed with enough information, anyone with half a brain can paint their argument into Van Gogh. And half the room will toast the bold and dramatic brushstrokes while the other half of the room reaches for a carving knife with which to cut off their ears.

The touchstone, regrettably, has been bastardized. As if Rob Zombie got hold of the Constitution and turned our fundamental principles into a kill count. Educated opinions have given way to a zealotry that seeks to deify even the most corrupt of men. Meaningful dialogue has been relegated to the ash heap thanks to dissociative politics that attempts to guilt us into confessing to crimes we didn’t commit.

What good is having all this information at our fingertips if we’re going to dis- it and mis- it into an interpretation?

During this sports debate, as the decibel levels increased, so to, did the tells; those easy to miss points of entry that had been glossed over initially were now much easier to hear. Both sides, using their information not as a map, but as a boxing glove with which to punch out their opponent. Much the same way a peaceful transfer of power might stage a coup, or a state might flout the concerns of a pandemic, or a city council might consider me the enemy because I’m an aging white dude.

I don’t know how we can possibly achieve a middle ground, because to quote Buffalo Springfield, nobody’s right if everybody’s wrong. And I have not a blessed answer residing under my cap, except for one.

Michael Jordan . . . duh.




36 thoughts on “From The Archives: Clowns To The Left Of Us, Danger To The Right

  1. Well…in the NBA’s cowtown, the argument is which tandem is better: Makar and McKinnon or Jokic and Murray. I’m sorry, it was as if they wanted to know which vegetable was better…peas or carrots? WTAF? Let’s compare apples and oranges while we’re at it. 🤦🏼‍♀️

    Liked by 1 person

      • Bwahahahahaha. Surely you’re just jesting about the Rockies? I dunno about how the Nugs will fare against Miami. They look pretty solid and formidable but it’s nice seeing them excited about getting to the finals. Course the national media is downplaying it, saying they didn’t play high seeded teams so it’s not a statement about how good they are/can be.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. B,

    I’m with John… you are always worth a reread. And guess what? They needs must flap their lips – no matter what nonsense is spewing from them – yanno, to justify their ridiculous salaries…

    And duh. Of course, Jordan!

    So. dang it, Miami lost last night, eh? According to ESPN: “Miami looks to clinch conference finals in game 6”. It ain’t over yet!

    You know how much I dig you (and your writing)!


    Liked by 1 person

  3. …. duh.. lol!

    “nobody’s right if everybody’s wrong” – so true
    That entire song is rife with truisms.

    You write fab essays, funny and fact full. Even if I don’t follow much sports, I sometimes get what your point is…. if there is one outside of the score.

    Anyway, finally got off my non writing duff, and finished ep. 4 of the D. B. saga.

    I hope you remember the previous.

    Part 4

    After reviewing all the options, it was decided the only possible scenario was to continue the shoot with Danny.

    So, he was pumped up with heavy pain killers, and the shoot proceeded.

    The pain killers took their toll. Daily he seemed to know less and less. Daily he became more “out of it”.

    Oddly, this big guy began coming to set with Danny. When I say big, I mean he seemed as tall as Danny’s Winne was high. Okay that would be 10- 12 feet, so maybe 7 feet tall. He was thick like a refrigerator. He stood outside Danny’s door all the time when Danny was not on set.

    No one on the crew knew who he was. Certainly he wasn’t in our Labour Union. Some said he was a thug, working for the gangsters Danny owed money to, and was there to make sure Danny didn’t skip.

    Others said he was a body guard hired by the production, to make sure some thug Danny owed money to didn’t get to him before filming was in the can. There were still plenty of joints and bones available for messing up.


    One day I had to go to Danny’s trailer to make sure he had gotten into his establishing wardrobe. During the days of painkillers, he wasn’t always able to sort out his costumes and real life wardrobe. If it was a continuity costume, the truck super or set supervisor would do the check. However, this was a new costume, an establishment and a job for the costume designer.

    As I went to knock on Danny’s door, the refrigerator grabbed my wrist. The guy was beyond scary. He wanted to know my business. I explained I was the costume designer and had come to check Danny’s costume before he went to set.

    Refrigerator ushered me aside, opened the door and spoke to Danny without entering the trailer. He shut the door and told me to wait. A few minutes later there was knocking from the inside. Refrigerator opened the door. I was not allowed to go in, as per usual procedure. I was allowed to stand in the doorway and look.

    There was Danny sitting on the couch that faced the door. He was bent over, one of his fists on the floor, his arm holding him up as much as possible. My gaze met Danny’s beautiful blue eyes. Gosh he’s a beauty! Nonetheless, I could see that no matter how much pain killer he was on, he was still in mega pain.

    One day his costume was a t-shirt & jeans or work wear pants. He was on a break in his trailer, having a cup of coffee. When it was time to go back to set we found he had lain down and dozed off. The cup of coffee was still in a hand. The remnants had spilled onto his t-shirt, and created a shape somewhat like a large medallion on his chest.

    Fortunately we had doubles on the t-shirt. I always doubled t-shirts, as they are prone to certain continuity issues. That day I went out and bought quads on all Danny’s t-shirts, doubles on every other top.

    Someone in wardrobe, having a sense of humour, drew a chain from each side of the coffee medallion and around the neck of the t.
    It hung on the wardrobe truck’s bulletin board for the rest of the shoot.

    A few days later, Danny was in a scene where he had to where a suit, shirt and tie.

    Again he was on a break, resting in his trailer. This time he relaxed with a cigarette. His suit jacket was on set, hanging on the Set Supervisor’s cart.
    That is a normal procedure. It’s hot on set, and often when an actor is off camera, they don’t wear the jacket.

    Anyway, he was in his shirt on break, having a smoke in his trailer and dozed off. The cigarette burned a hole where the shirt’s pocket was. Yay, we had doubles on the shirt.
    However, Danny did not want to change, as they were rushing him to set. No worries, he told wardrobe, I’ll just keep my jacket on!

    Half hour later I went to set to check on things. Danny was doing his scene. He was sitting in a chair, his suit jacket hanging over the back of the chair.

    You win some. You lose some.

    The last day of shooting, at call time, Danny’s driver came to me in Honeyland. He gave me a black wardrobe basket filled with a strange dark gelatinous mass inside. He informed me that Danny had worn his wardrobe home the night before, and it was being returned.

    I thanked the driver warmly, and slid the basket under the wardrobe truck. I informed the Truck Super and went on my way.

    Danny didn’t seem to recognize me that morning, but why should he? We were shooting on a construction site. As per regulations, I was wearing a hard hat and safety goggles. Danny had been through weeks of pain and pills haze.

    Crazy as it seems, no matter what, when the camera rolled, Danny was on.

    I’ll never forget his special heartfelt hugs. Danny remains one of my all time faves.

    Liked by 1 person

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