Still Frank: February 2023

Although this post is a day off, Imma asked me to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in with some random thoughts about the ongoing month and the new one. Thanks to Marc for the space.

January was a frightening football event that occurred in my city followed by a remarkable recovery, a disruptive majority in the US House, Brazilians crashing their capitol about an election, a battering ram of storms hitting California, Harry & Meghan, crowning a national college football champion, big tech layoffs, classified documents, Memphis police, Australian Open tennis champions, determining Super Bowl participants, and politicians saying stupid shit.

January deaths included the youngest kid in Eight is Enough, a famed rock guitarist, a 90s supermodel, a Heisman winner, a legendary football official, The King’s daughter, a daredevil who was a son of a daredevil, La Lolla, one of CSNY, the world’s oldest known person, a renowned basketball commentator, a hockey legend, Laverne best friend (Shirley), and people dying from gun violence, natural disasters, and war.

In case you missed it, here are a few January headline gems from The Onion

  • Man who stopped dieting already seeing results
  • Microbes growing in airpods really getting into Radiohead
  • Wistful woman doesn’t want kids but still wants to name people
  • Hospital tells public it can schedule CPR in 6 weeks
  • Parents feel safer letting their kids drink and drive under their own roof
  • Cautious climber cuts off arm to prevent it from getting pinned under fallen boulder

Try the Combo Challenge. By using only the words in the above headlines, create your headline, then share it in your comment. My combo appears later in this post.

As one who regularly checks my WP Spam folder, I wonder about AlanWraky, AnnaWraky, BooWraky, CarlWraky, DenWraky, EvaWraky, EyeWraky, JackWraky, JaneWraky, JasonWraky, JimWraky, JoeWraky, JonWraky, KiaWraky, KimWraky, LisaWraky, MarkWraky, MaryWraky, MiaWraky, NickWraky, PaulWraky, SamWraky, SueWraky, TedWraky, TeoWraky, UgoWrakly, WimWraky, and ZakWraky. Are they related? If so, that’s one high participation rate in a family business!

For those remembering my mail saga in October, I received this message from USPS this past Monday. The US Postal Service® received the search request you submitted and it’s being processed. Your package has not yet been recovered, but every effort is being made to locate your item(s). We apologize for any inconvenience and thank you for your patience.

Did you know: The Periodic Table contains 118 elements? Take a Periodic Table quiz here.

FYI: Did you hear about the woman riding around the world with her German shepherd?

Congratulations to the last inductees to the Songwriters Hall of Fame, so I toast the first Hispanic female inductee.

Because today starts a new month, it’s time for an overview of some of the celebrations February has to offer. For a complete list of February celebrations, click here.

Monthly celebrations for February include adopting a rescued rabbit, barley, fasting, Florida strawberries, library lovers, bird feeding, Black history, cherries, goat yoga, snack foods, sweet potatoes, and spunky old broads.

February is also a month to increase your awareness about the heart, Marfan’s Syndrome, low vision, and spay & neuter.

Weekly toasts in February include snow sculpting (1-5), love makes the world go round but laughter keeps us from getting dizzy (8-14), random acts of kindness (12-18), flirting (12-18), and saunas (19-25).

Day celebrations in February include bubble gum (3rd), Nutella & shower with a friend (5th), Canadian maple syrup (6th), Periodic Table (7th), pizza (9th), pork rinds (12th), popcorn (13th), my birthday (17th), drink wine (18th), Fat Tuesday (21st), curling (23rd), dance (24th), and cupcakes (27th). Unfortunately, this year you can’t celebrate Superman’s birthday on his birthday. For a complete list of January celebrations, click here.

February Moons: Full (5th), New (20th)

My Combo: Wistful woman cuts off arm of cautious man who stopped dieting to schedule Radiohead in hospital

To take you into February, enjoy this classic remake by Buddy Guy, fittingly featuring Jeff Beck. I’m out of here. Happy Crepe Day!

Being Frank: January 2023

Happy New Year Everyone!

With a month ending and another starting, Imma asked me to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in with some random thoughts. But today is not a break because I’m pulling double duty, so I hope you stop by for the first beach walk of 2023. Thanks to Marc for the space.

December was a time for Kennedy Center Honors, China & a variety of COVID events, Peruvian president tried to dissolve Peru’s Congress, a prisoner exchange, more Nigerian violence, Russia-Ukraine, a nuclear fusion breakthrough, Orion’s return, FTX, a World Cup winner, Zelenskyy visits Washington, January 6th Committee report, a winter bomb cyclone, a grumpy old man in Florida who is a one-trick pony with NFTs complaining about stuff he brings upon himself, and politicians saying stupid shit.

December deaths included a baseball Hall of Famer and Ancient Mariner, a Cheers bar maiden, a high-profile college football coach, a notable sports journalist in his 40s, a popular dancing DJ, Cincinnati’s Mr. Perfect, an NFL HOF RB & Immaculate Receptionist, a women’s golf legend, a music producer of Philadelphia soul, a Brazilian soccer legend, a pioneering journalist, a former pope, and people dying from gun violence, natural disasters, and war.

Some people are making a big deal of Congressman-elect George Santos lying about his background. An opposing viewpoint: His perfect for the job because many elected to Congress are frequent liars.

Cheers to this mascot for this sneak attack on an unknowing reporter.

Photo by Pixabay on

Do you remember my October encounter with the postal service (USPS)? The one when I mailed tracked mail that tracking showed as in-transit (undelivered) – so I followed the USPS process trying to locate the mailing that I eventually tagged as Lost – only to discover it was timely delivered but never scanned – so it wasn’t lost when I declared it as lost. The story continues with a fitting ending to 2022. Yesterday morning (31st Dec), I received the following from USPS,

“The US Postal Service® received the search request you submitted (1st Nov) and it’s being processed. Your package has not yet been recovered, but every effort is being made to locate your item(s).”

Perfect – but given the hassle I endured, I don’t have the heart to tell them the joke is on them.

In case you missed it, here are a few December headline gems from The Onion:

  • Winter clothing drive urgently requests more giant foam fingers
  • Christmas tree lot guy ready for annual 46-week vacation
  • Amish horse has probably never used a cell phone
  • Skeleton in sketchy doctor’s office assembled completely wrong
  • Agent drops Meryl Streep after she fails to develop massive TikTok following
  • Family scandalized after grandmother leaves hot, young caretaker her cherished cobbler recipe
  • Try the Combo Challenge. By using only the words in the above headlines, create your headline, then share it in your comment. My combo appears later in this post.

Did you know: Found in the neck and shaped like a butterfly, the thyroid gland serves as the location of another set of glands – the parathyroids.

Wondering: Which governing body is more corrupt: International Olympic Committee (IOC) or Fédération Internationale de Football Association (FIFA)?

FYI: Gingercello is a good drink to warm the throat.

If you didn’t see the Kennedy Center Honors, you missed this performance.

Because today starts a new month, it’s time for an overview of some of the celebrations January has to offer. For a complete list of January celebrations, click here.

Monthly celebrations for January include brain teasers, creativity, hot tea, polka music, soup, and introverts.

January is also a month to increase your awareness about bath safety, glaucoma, birth defects, cervical health, and thyroid gland.

Weekly toasts in January include Feel Great (1-7), Cuckoo Dancing (11-17), Idioms (15-21), and Clean Out Your Inbox (22-28).

Day celebrations in January include Mummers (1st), Cheese Lovers (2nd), Festival of Sleep (3rd), Whipped Cream (5th), Bubble Baths (8th), Learn Your Name in Morse Code (11th), Popcorn (19th), Cheesy Socks (21st), Talk Like a Grizzled Prospector (24th), Thomas Crapper (27th), and Bubble Wrap (30th). For a complete list of January celebrations, click here.

January Moons: Full 6th, New 21st

My Combo: Sketchy Meryl Streep scandalized hot, young Amish doctor’s foam fingers

Enjoy this Kenny Chesney because that time of the year for me is nearing. Have a good January everyone. I’m out of here. Happy New Year and Happy Ellis Island Day!

Perfectly Frank: November ’22

Photo by cottonbro on

With one month ending and another starting, Imma asked me to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space.

November 1st is the day after a US lottery of $1 billion, so you are probably hearing the news of one person in Ohio winning the big prize.

I just returned from 17 days in France. A tough task, but I met the challenge. It was great being away from the news and the flood of political ads in my area, so I don’t know much about what happened but I’m confident that politicians said some stupid shit.

A bit of research served as a reminder about Russia-Ukraine, Iranian civil unrest, a new home run record by one of Marc’s heroes, a crazy killing spree in Thailand, a court telling an American conspiracist to pay $1 billion in damages, Liz Truss losing to a head of lettuce, a crowd crush in Seoul, females becoming the majority in New Zealand’s parliament, and Massachusetts naming on official state dinosaur.

October deaths included a country music legend, the designer of the first mask-cage hockey goalie mask, a Golden Globe-Tony winner actress who starred on TV, MLB HOF inductee, an R&R pioneer and legend of Great Balls of Fire, and people dying from gun violence, natural disasters, and war.

Photo by cottonbro on

In case you missed it, here are a few October headline gems from The Onion:

  • School budget committee decides to eliminate 4th-grade entirely
  • Scientists find dolphins only other mammal that jet ski for pleasure
  • Man can’t remember what he ran into burning building for
  • Prison warden sadistic but fair
  • Sanitation worker digs around truck for source of weird smell
  • Man suspecting opponent with all queens hustling him
  • Weird bug eaten by weirder bug

Try the Combo Challenge. By using only the words in the above headlines, create your headline, then share it in your comment. My combo appears later in this post.

Wondering: Is incompetence growing?

Did you know normal bone marrow produces 10,000,000,000 red blood cells and 150,000,000 white blood cells every hour?

Our 17-days in France included Paris & Dijon on our own, cruising down the Saone and Rhone rivers tasting wine, and Nice on our own. There were many highlights, but the Carrières des Lumières in Les Baux-de-Provence delivered the biggest surprise. It’s a large cave left from a limestone stone quarry that has been transformed into a magnificent walk-around theater for digital displays on its large walls. We saw Venice (a short clip if interested), but the clip below is from an older show about Gaudi. FYI: For those who have seen the traveling immersions about Van Gogh, Monet, or others, as good as those shows are, they cannot compare to the cave experience!

Because today starts a new month, it’s time for an overview of some of the celebrations on October’s plate. For a complete list of November celebrations, click here.

Monthly celebrations for November include picture books, banana pudding, family stories, pomegranates, memoir writing, sweet potatoes, and vegans.

November is also a month to increase your awareness about diabetes, epilepsy, family adoption, bone marrow, and gluten-free diets.

Weekly toasts in November include figs (1-7), Dear Santa letters (7-13), split pea soup (12-18), and better conversations (20-27).

Day celebrations in November include hockey masks (1), Cookie Monster’s birthday (2), pumpkin destruction (4), origami (11), Roc Your Mocs (15), homemade bread (17), Rocky & Bullwinkle (19), and Slinkies (27). Click here for a complete list.

For anyone wondering, I hope to return to posting my beach walk essays this weekend.

My Combo: Sadistic dolphins eliminate school sanitation worker hustling burning man

Because we were in the land of Van Gogh, I close this edition with a musical tribute to him accompanied by a similar illumination show in Paris. Have a good November everyone. I’m out of here, Happy Calzone Day!

Perfectly Frank: October ’22

Photo by Lucas Pezeta on

With one month ending and another starting, Imma asked to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space.

September 2022 delivered fire, floods, earthquakes, the Mar-a-Lago documents legal saga, Blue Origin’s rocket failure, a huge tribute concert, Ukraine-Russia, the UK getting a new monarch and PM, 74th Emmy Awards, transporting immigrants, re-introducing cheetahs into India, a 700th homerun, a 61st homerun, more fake news, and politicians saying stupid shit.

September deaths included musicians, sports figures, a pioneer journalist, and people dying from gun violence, natural disasters, and war.

The world mourned and saluted Queen Elizabeth. A toast to a lady of honor, duty, dignity, respect, peace, class, and more. The funeral was riveting for me.

Tennis is moving one without two of its greats. First Serena Williams, now Roger Federer. Serena won 39 Grand Slam titles, while Federer only won 20. Interestingly, the Big 3 (Federer, Nadal, and Djokovic) won 63 of the last 77 Grand Slam titles. Now that’s dominance!

I started September at the Italian Consulate to begin my dual citizenship process. I drove 4 hours for an appointment I made 2 years ago to be told the person left early for a personal emergency. Oh well, at least they have my papers. Because I was not asked any questions nor had the chance to ask anything, I have no clue what’s next.

In September I learned my state (Ohio) is 4th (out of 50) in the number of reported Bigfoot sightings. I’m so proud.

In case you missed it, here are a few September headline gems from The Onion:

  • Historic preservationists place Eiffel Tower inside jar of formaldehyde
  • Bug crawling on ceiling must be possessed by a demon
  • Pregnancy test probably only lying for attention
  • Referees call for instant replay to admire great call
  • Flamethrower set to mist

A blast from the past. Try the Combo Challenge. By using only the words in the above headlines, create your headline, then share it in your comment. My combo appears later in this post.

In September we watched the opening episode of Our Great National Parks on Netflix. The stunning images and videography will get your attention while “Our” in the title is very fitting. Plus, the narrator won an Emmy for Outstanding Narrator.

For some strange reason, this just came to me. Did you know liver cells are 6-sided?

I missed ushering in September because my wife and I traveled in August. This 2-minute video summarizes our wonderful trip, and the song has great lyrics!

Because today starts a new month, it’s time for an overview of some of the celebrations on October’s plate. For a complete list of October celebrations, click here.

Monthly celebrations for October include apples, bats, black cats, caramel, class reunions, corn, feral hogs, Italian-American heritage, pizza, popcorn, right-brainers, squirrels, and toilet tank repair.

October is also a month to increase your awareness about blindness, breast cancer, bullying prevention, Celiac Disease, domestic violence, Down Syndrome, Dyslexia, global diversity, sarcasm, and the liver.

Weekly toasts include No Salt Week (3rd-10th), School Lunches (9th-14th), Meditation & Chemistry (15th-21st), Asexuality (25th-31st), and Magic (25th-31st)

Day celebrations include Tacos & Vodka (4th), Pierogies & Octopus (8th), Kick Butt (9th), Pasta (15th & 25th), Howl at the Moon (26th), Champagne (27th), Chocolate (28th), Candy Corn (30th), Halloween (31st), and many more. See for yourself.

My Combo: Historic preservationists admire lying demon bug inside pregnancy test

Have a good October everyone. I’m out of here, so enjoy a bit of Buddy Guy. Happy Pickle Day!

Still Perfectly Frank: 01 Aug 2022

Photo by Pixabay on

With one month ending and another starting, Imma asked to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space.

July’s headlines included more mass shootings, a former Japanese PM assassinated, college football losing its mind, a new UK PM, political unrest in Sri Lanka, failures of the Uvalde police, more unnecessary Russian attacks in Ukraine, Wimbledon, The Open, more Congressional hearings about January 6th, Bennifer marriage, my fourth dose of Covid vaccine, more fake news, and politicians saying stupid shit.

We also remember those who departed us in July 2022: the last Band of Brothers, Sonny Corleone, an F-Troop star, Sopranos actor, composer of the James Bond theme, the first ex-wife of an ex-president, a mouth on Big Mouth, an actor of tough guys, a climate scientist pioneer, an original Star Trek lieutenant, an NBA legend, and people dying from gun violence, natural disasters, and war.

On 12th July, NASA released the first pictures from the James Webb Space Telescope. I’m in awe of images of deep space. Here’s the first collection.

July marked my closest encounter ever with a tornado. Not one, but two! An F2 tornado was 4.5 miles (7.2 km) away and an F1 tornado 2.3 miles (3.7 km) away. Both were way too close for comfort.

This didn’t happen in July, but I learned about it during July, so that’s good enough for me. An Ohio man (my state) was the first person ever diagnosed with a whistling scrotum. As Steven Cobert asked, “Did it forget the words?”

Photo by cottonbro on

In case you missed it, here are a few July headline gems from The Onion:

  • Extra-Mad Wife Forces Husband to Sleep on Ottoman
  • Skeptical Doctor Asks Woman Flattened by Steamroller to Rate Pain
  • Wings in Basket from 3 Chickens Who Were Friends
  • Archeologists Discovered “Big Dog” Shirt Christ Wore to Sleep In
  • Insurance Company Swears They Will Get the Next Round
  • Scattered Deaths of Elderly Floridians Expected Throughout the Week

Here’s a blast from the past. Try the Combo Challenge. By using only the words in the above headlines, create your personal headline, then share it in your comment. My combo appears later in this post.

For those desiring information about monkeypox, The Onion provides answers here.

Because we live in the age of “smart” products, readers should consider the Woodbridge B0990S Smart Toilet. It features a built-in bidet, motion-activated open-and-close lid, auto flushing, a heated seat, night light, and a multi-functional remote. Sorry to say, it doesn’t offer a wiping function. But if you have a spare $1200 and Marc won’t give you his address, you may want to consider it.

I always enjoy Steve Hartman’s positive stories on CBS News – but this one about Dexter the dog is amazing … and it delivers a message for everyone.

Because today starts a new month, it’s time for an overview of some of the celebrations on August’s plate. For a complete list of July celebrations, click here.

  • Monthly celebrations for August include cowgirls, goat cheese, panini, crayon collection, and happiness happens.
  • Weekly toasts include Psychic Week (1-5), Buttons (7-13), Weird Contests (14-20), Chef Appreciation (21-27), and Chuckwagon Races (27-9/4)
  • Day celebrations include underwear (5th), root beer floats (6th), prosecco (13th), spumoni (21st), waffle irons (24th), go topless (28th), more herbs-less salt (29th), and many more. See for yourself.

Besides their on-the-field accomplishments, professional athletes tend to make the news after doing something stupid. Unfortunately, that tarnishes the many pro athletics who are good people and even better citizens. Click here for a local story of one of Cincinnati’s finest – Reds second baseman Jonathan India.

I knew I had to use this story when I first saw it. Crescencia Garcia is 102 years old, a Covid survivor, and a member of an all-Black Women unit during WWII – the 6888th – the Six Triple Eight – the only unit of its kind to serve in Europe. This past June, CBS Mornings interviewed her, which they aired a few weeks ago. See it for yourself.

My Combo: Skeptical Steamroller Swears Big Dog Flattened Extra-mad Chicken Wing

Here’s one of my favorite covers of a classic song from a great show I attended years ago. I’m out of here. Merry Loafmas!

Perfectly Frank June ’22

Photo by Alexas Fotos on

With one month ending and another starting, Imma asked to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Because the new month starts on a Wednesday (Tuesday), Imma also said I’m not bumping Dale – and no way would I even consider that thought! Marc, thanks for the space.

2022 provided a rainy May for Cincinnati, which has become the fifth rainiest Mays in recorded history.

May was a month featuring continued conflict in Ukraine, a baby formula shortage in the US, a leaked Supreme Court draft ruling, rising gas prices, the second biggest longshot Kentucky Derby winner, photos of the center of the Milky Way (confirming no nougat), a Eurovision winner from Ukraine, too many mass shootings in the US, the one-millionth COVID death in the US, and politicians saying stupid shit.

We remember those who departed us in May 2022: a basketball Hall of Famer, a Napa Valley wine pioneer, a Greek keyboardist-composer-Oscar winner, shooting victims, a Field of Dreams actor, and iPods.

In case you missed it, here are a few May headline gems from The Onion: Man Scared of Committing to Earpods because he’s Afraid to Someday Lose Them; Affection for Restaurant Dialed Back upon Realization It’s a Chain; New Diversity Initiative; Elderly Man Spends Afternoons Feeding Self to Ducks; and Sacrificial Altar Comfier than Expected.

For some crazy reason, this compilation fits for a transition.

June starts tomorrow, so there is new stuff to celebrate. Monthly celebrations for June include smiles, sponges, papaya, surf music, bathroom reading, celibacy awareness, and naked bike riding. Weekly cake and candles include International Clothesline Week (4-11), Duct Tape Days (16-18), and Craft Spirits (19-25). Day celebrations include Oscar the Grouch (1st), Moonshine (5th), YoYo (6th), Ghostbuster’s (8th), Sex (9th), Bourbon (14th), Prunes (15th), Tapas (16th), Garfield the Cat (19th), Gongs (21st), Runner’s Selfie (23rd), and Bike Naked Day (25th). For a complete list of June celebrations, check it out here.

Earlier this spring the Biden Administration created a Disinformation Governance Board (DGB). The DGB is currently on hold for organization or reorganization, but I still have a few thoughts. 1) That’s a waste of time and money. 2) Disinformation is defined by the person occupying the Oval Office. 3) This is an excellent example of trying to protect people from themselves. 4) It doesn’t prevent politicians from talking.

May was a horrible month for mass shootings in America. As one party wants tight controls, the other avoids the issue by offering no solutions to lame excuses. So the beat goes on … but I’m not playing Sonny and Cher. Perhaps this headline from The Onion is a good explanation: No Way to Prevent This’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens.

Baseball season is well underway, so here are two bookends. After two months, Marc’s Yankees have the best record in baseball while my Reds have the worst. I proudly say that my streak continues of not hearing or seeing one pitch.

Because we hope to see Top Gun: Maverick in the theaters, we recently revisited the original movie on Netflix. For those who may want to do the same, today (Tuesday 31st May) is the last day it will be streaming on Netflix.

Thank you, May, for doing what you do. Being it’s the last day of the month, don’t forget to celebrate Necrotizing Fasciitis Awareness Day (Flesh-Eating Bacteria). June starts tomorrow, so you can start the month with Oscar the Grouch Day. At least now you know what’s going on. I’m out of here.

Still Perfectly Frank: 01 May ’22

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on

With one month ending and another starting, Imma asked to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space. 

While spring rolled in during April in the northern hemisphere, the southern hemisphere embraced autumn. Meanwhile, April provided the confirmation of a new Supreme Court justice, Russia’s continued assault on Ukraine, the return of Coachella, a new Masters champion, a physical altercation at the Oscars, and another COVID variant on the loose. 

We also remember those who departed us in April 2022: George Costanza’s mother,  the longest-serving Republican senator (retired), the world’s oldest woman (119), a Tony and Emmy award winner, a star country singer, an MLB batting champ, 2 NHL Hall of Famers, an NFL Hall of Famer, and the quarterback known as The Mad Bomber. 

In case you missed it, here are a few April headline gems from The Onion: Airlines announce it is safe to fly indoors again, Mayonnaise label warns product for external use only, Man shopping for cheap sunglasses troubled by reviews calling sunglasses cheap, and K-Y introduces new drowsy nighttime lube. The Onion also provided an infographic of Putin’s inner circle.  

In April I did a beach walk about containers. In her comment, Eileen mentioned a George Carlin segment. I adore his brilliance! 

May is here, so it is time to celebrate. Monthly celebrations include drums, vinegar, barbeque, Mediterranean diet, Sweet Vidalia Onions, and Latino books. Weekly celebrations include craft beer (16-22), foul balls (16-21), root canal appreciation (1-7), and clitoris awareness (1-7). Daily festivities include paranormals (3rd), tubas (6th), Moscato (9th), limericks (12th), belly dancing (14th), taffy (23rd), and brisket (28th). For a complete list of monthly, weekly, and daily celebrations in May, check it out here.

Baseball season has started. For the first time in my personal history, I don’t give a shit. While Reds ownership wants to save money, I’m will one-up them by saving time and money. I proudly say I have not watched or listened to one pitch yet. Meanwhile, the team is on pace to fall short of the number of games won by the 1962 Mets. Now that’s pathetic!

On the football side of life, I’m still amazed how the NFL has turned the annual draft of college players into a marketing event.

I came close in a recent lottery drawing for over $400 million. After getting 18, I was just off my a few numbers: 10 instead of 12, 21 instead of 20, 36 instead of 39, 55 instead of 60, and 7 instead of 10. 

I love the great perspective of scientist Neils Degraff Tyson. When asked how far into space public trips go, he said think of the world globe in the school classroom. The trip goes about the thickness of two dimes.  

There is a movement in the US (at the state level) to ban something from being taught that isn’t taught … and led by the party proclaiming to be about less government in life. I find that interesting. 

French presidential candidate Marine Le Pen receiving over 40% of the vote is another sign that the world is in trouble. 

Ohio has a primary election in early May. Five Republicans are vying for the open senate seat. Interestingly, Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Rand Paul, and the retiring senator endorsed different candidates. We’ve been seeing TV ads since last fall … and thankfully, this round will be over soon. 

Thank you, April … and cheers to starting the month of May. Enjoy the music and Happy Bubba Day! 

Still Perfectly Frank – April ’22 edition

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on

Another month is nearing an end, Imma asked me to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space.

March provided Ukraine, Putin, a US Supreme Court nominee hearing, continued COVID saga, gas prices, busted March Madness brackets, baseball’s labor agreement, Oscar awards, Grammy nominees, and other stuff. We also remember those who departed us such as a Good Times actor, a Holocaust survivor, a US diplomat, the creator of GIF images, Foo Fighters drummer, a country singer, William Hurt, Traci Braxton, and some guy named Bob somewhere.

For those looking forward to the new month, April is the month to celebrate guitars, celery, humor, pets, poetry, pecans, hope, and straw hats. April also provides week-long celebrations for dance, coins, princesses, and popper scoopers. April also offers an array of one-day celebrations such as ferrets (2nd), lying (4th), beer (7th), tartan (9th), licorice (12th), dolphins & ex-spouses (14th), Amaretto (19th), zippers (28th), and many more. Check it out here.

In case you missed it, here are a few March headline gems from The Onion. Oscar Mayer Introduces new filter-tip hot dogs for a healthier meat-eating experience, Pope Francis using a new treadmill-altar to add more physical activity to the workday, God regrets never learning Spanish, and Texas bans consensual sex.

Hats off to Steve Hartman (CBS News) for his features focusing on good news. I like this edition about empathy and a superhero.

In mid-March, I did this beach walk essay about bloggers. Something interesting happened. The first 12 comments were from bloggers in 9 different countries.

March was the time we returned home after several months as snowbirds. During that time I drafted about 30 new beach walk essays. Then again, all of them have a long way to go before they are ready to post.

I yawned at the news that baseball settled their labor dispute. I’ve been a fan for a long time, but they are wearing me out. Shortly after the settlement, my Reds traded many of their better players to decrease payroll. I sighed as my interest waned even more. I should follow their lead and reallocate my resources elsewhere.

Laura, who occasionally visits Beach Walk Reflections, composes music. I found her latest to be great background music as I write. I invite you to listen by visiting this site – the music will be in the upper left. Besides, I love the title of her musical suite.

Are you a supertaster? If not, do you know anyone who is? Here’s an interesting article about supertasters.

In a dream, I imagine a time when politicians ask good and relevant judicial questions to court nominees. In reality, their questions and statements demonstrate that politicians are the best hypocrites while demonstrating a “party-first” mentality with minimal interest in good judicial questions.

According to the 22nd Amendment, a president cannot hold office for more than two consecutive terms. So, will Donald Trump admit that he lost in 2020? After all, if he won, he can’t run. Thank you, Doonesbury for that one.

At the end of today, we can close the door to March and welcome April. Happy St. Stupid Day … well, tomorrow – April 1st – and that’s not a joke!

Still Perfectly Frank: 1st March ’22

Another month is nearing an end, Imma asked me to take a break from Beach Walk Reflections and pitch in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space.

Photo by mali maeder on

February was the time for more Omicron, ground, Congo, hogs, inflation, Joe Rogan & Spotify, Putin’s disregard for humanity, presidential documents, trucker blockades, avocados, Super Bowl LVI, and the Ides of February. Damn, the Bengals have now lost three Super Bowls by a total of 12 points. We also remember those that left us in February such as a Holocaust survivor, the “Ghostbusters” producer, first responders, and the lead singer of Procol Harum.

February gave us the Olympics and its thrill of victory and the agony of defeat, stories of dedication, overcoming, perseverance, and much of humanity’s goodness – plus a bunch of crap from the Russians. But I enjoy watching the skill and strategy of curling. I’ve curled before, so believe me, it’s damn hard.

Many years ago I asked, “Why isn’t there a competition of acrobatics going off a ski jump?” Because they are doing that now, it’s time for more questions. Why isn’t there a competition involving an inner tube? When will there be a competition involving a sled going down the ski jump?

Maybe this summarizes February … but them there varmints aren’t beavers.

March starts with Mardi Gras ending (Fat Tuesday) and ends with Bunsen Burner Day. Interestingly, both involve calories. March is a time for monthly celebrations of noodles, quinoa, peanuts, frozen foods, adopting a rescued guinea pig, and more. March is a month for weekly celebrations of owls, procrastination, chocolate, and more. March is the month for daily celebrations including the following: sock monkeys (5th), Oreo cookies (6th), Bagpipes (10th), Pi (14th), Buzzards return to Hinckley (15th), Swallows return to Capistrano (19th), and many more. For those interested in a long list of March celebrations, click here.

Baseball’s spring training was set to start. I have a challenge for MLB and the Player’s Union. Go ahead – sit out the entire damn year! No guts, no glory for you. (Thanks for the ending, Soup Nazi.)

Attendance at college football games has dropped seven years in a row to 1981 levels? Damn, someone needs the No-Shit Sherlock Award for Brilliance! Let’s see – expensive tickets, game time is “To Be Announced” until the week before (prohibiting planning), annual booster fees for season ticket holders, and many games are on TV or streaming. However, the rich get richer because college football is big business.

Hats off to Steve Hartman (CBS News) for his features focusing on good news – like this one!

I’m not a fan of former Vice President Mike Pence, but a tip of the cap to him for refuting an ex-president by saying he did not have the Constitutional power to overturn the election.

“Legitimate political discourse” is an interesting description of the events of January 6, 2021. Meanwhile, let’s tear, shred, and flush official documents down the toilet while complaining about Hillary Clinton’s emails. Lock her up! Lock her up!

Back in the day, President Reagan pressured Mikhail Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin Wall. Today, Donald Trump praises Vladimir Putin as a genius and his move to declare two Ukrainian states independent as brilliant. Why didn’t President Reagan praise Russia for building a strong Berlin Wall? To John Dickerson (CBS News), thanks for the thought.

Speaking of Ukraine, here’s one from Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-Co). “I pray for Ukraine, and I wish them the best. They have a great president right now ….. But we also have neighbors to the north who need freedom and need to be liberated, and we need that right here at home as well.”

Former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo blames President Biden for the situation in Ukraine. I vehemently disagree because knowledge people know it’s Obama’s fault.

I’m not sure I’ve ever seen so many censure declarations by a political party of their own as we are seeing these days. That’s just one more reason why I continue to say the two biggest problems in Washington are the Democrats and Republicans – and the wacky on each side are making it worse. Yes, AOC and her flock are like fingernails on a blackboard – they make my ears hurt!

While in Cincinnati endorsing author JD Vance for Senate, Rep. Margorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga) stated, “Vaccine mandates are the worst thing that has ever happened in America.” Yes MTG – worse than 9-11, Pearl Harbor, Oklahoma City bombings, the Great Depression, both World Wars, and our Civil War. Perhaps the people of her district who elected her are even more whacky than her.

Here’s more whacky! The mayor of Hudson (Ohio) spoke against ice fishing on a city park’s lake because, “And if you then allow ice fishing with shanties, then that leads to another problem. Prostitution.” He resigned – but I’m guessing because he’s now qualified for higher office.

A great American orator offers a great summary.

People love to complain about the weather forecast when it is off-target. But, I’m guessing more people trust their local weather personality about predicting the weather than epidemiologists and medical professionals about the pandemic.

As one final tribute to February, missing The Onion is missing a lot. After all, The Onion told us that Archeologists discover more old shit that sucks; Breast reduction surgeon freaks out after misplacing patient’s nipples; Teacher fired for breaking state’s Critical Race Theory laws after telling students she’s Black; and a 13-year-old drinking prodigy accepted to university.

Close the door to February and enjoy your March. I need a beach walk and a good last world. Click here for it. Toss in a good drink, time for a Bushwacker with a topper. Happy Pancake Day!

Still Perfectly Frank: 01 Feb ’22

Photo by Bas Masseus on

Another month is nearing an end, I’m pitching in for some random thoughts. Thanks to Marc for the space.

January 2022 started by turning the page to a new year that Betty White wouldn’t see 100. January was a time for victory and disappointment of bowl games and playoffs. January started with Cincinnati Bearcats fans, “Full of pride and disappointment. Disappointment and pride.” (Thanks, Doc).

January also marked the first Cincinnati Bengals playoff win in 31 years – a time when the elder Bush was US President. Then a second win on the road against the top seed – the franchise’s first-ever playoff road win. Then came another road win after trailing by 18 points for a win that shocked the world and earned a trip to the Super Bowl. Unbelievable!

If someone would have told me back in September that two Cincinnati football teams would be in the final four, I would have pronounced them as crazy. Egg on my face!

January marked more Omicron, a January 6th anniversary, filibuster, the Australia-Novak Djokovic, Russia-Ukraine, a person receiving a pig heart, somebody else a pig kidney, a Jeopardy champion, a Supreme Court opening, Tonga, Spotify, Big Papi, and Duchess Kate turning 40. Let us not forget the goodbyes to Bob Saget, Sidney Poitier, Ronnie Spector, André Leon Talley, Meatloaf, Louie Anderson, Johnny Fever, a Tuskegee Airman, a Woodstock founder, first responders, and the oldest person in the USA (age 115).

February offers opportunities to celebrate. Besides, no more Bloganuary (woo hoo!). February is a time for monthly celebrations of cherries, grapefruit, snack foods, cat health, and responsible pet owners. The 13th-19th celebrates random acts of kindness and more food. The 5th is worth marking down because it offers a great combo: Ice Cream for Breakfast Day and Nutella Day. For those who want to know more about February celebrations, click here.

February is the time Spring Training is supposed to start – but will it?

These words from an AP News report struck me about human migration and immigration throughout the world. “Their faces are like our faces — hesitant, sad, expectant, wary, curious, hopeful. They are the human beings among us who are trying to get — desperate to get — somewhere else. Somewhere safer, more prosperous, more for them.” (AP News)

Willie Geist referred to the past two years as “The Great Frustration“. I think that fits.

Speaking of Covid, yep – it found me, one who is fully vaccinated, boosted, and cautious. The good news is that my symptoms were minor: stuffy head and a light recurring cough. The vaccine did its duty. Out of respect to others, I quarantined and played it smart. FYI: Test results don’t report the variant because that requires gene sequencing.

Views of deep space fascinate me. I’m not sure if it is awe, inspiration, spirituality, wonder, amazement, or a combination of these factors. I look forward to future images from the James Webb Space Telescope. Well, assuming the mission is successful.

What does this mean? Of the 435 representatives, only 55 are members of the Problem Solvers Caucus – a bipartisan group committed to finding common ground on issues.

I wrote the following earlier this month: “Republicans are the ones promoting themselves as the defenders of the US Constitution. Yet, not only are they the ones who want to amend it, they would like to rewrite the Constitution in their view by calling for a Constitutional Convention.” When I stated that to a friend of mine about a year ago, he was surprised and wondered why this wasn’t being talked about. Interestingly, the Columbus Dispatch recently posted this article about Ohio.

The USA is a republic – and a republic uses the decisions of its people. Therefore, a republic relies on an informed public. Being Glenn Beck’s recent book is among bestsellers, this could be another sign the republic is in danger.

I heard this in a local news interview. “I’m a former graduate of Cincinnati Public Schools ….” I wonder: Did he give up his diploma? Did the school district revoke his diploma?

Reminder: Don’t forget to check your WP Comments Spam folder for comments that shouldn’t be there.

The Onion told us in January that shitty music helped a moron through the hardest times of his pointless life; a man is horrified after a genealogy test confirms he has no past; and, grateful pigeons in the park finally return the favor by feeding a whole loaf of bread to an old man. When you miss The Onion, you miss a lot.

Close the door to January and enjoy your February. Happy National Serpent Day!